05 September 2006

Paris reflections

Hearing: Rockstar - Nickleback

I got back from yet another Paris yesterday. It was a layover spent in the hotel, sounds crazy i know but those of you who fly will understand. The afternoon before pickup spent walking around the local area - i had intended to send something from the local post office but i didnt realise it was a Sunday. I had tried to get some sleep but my efforts were fruitless, i just couldnt. I was lying in bed for over an hour with no results. I ended up grabbing my jacket and heading outside.

There is this small grassy area infront of the hotel near the driveway where i lay down and just watched the clouds go by. I got to thinking where i was and where i wanted to be and if this is what i wanted and all sorts of D&Ms. I was thinking that i was really lucky to have this job but being away from my family isnt any fun either. I missed being home (maybe im homesick) i miss being able to go into my backyard and breathe clean air as opposed to 24/7 airconditioning. I miss clouds!! I missed being able to sit on grass and watch the sky as the clouds move accross it or birds fly past. There is a serious lack of nature in the sandpit and i never realised how important it was for me to have it.

Then i got to thinking about where i was, i was in PARIS! and yet i wasnt giddy happy, not even excited not even remotely interested, i could have been anywhere. For as long as i remember ive wanted to travel and flying seemed the best way (and it is) but im begining to think there is such a thing as too much travel. Usually travel is a big deal you spend ages saving up for it, you plan the hotel what your going to do and see, tell everyone, count down the days, check and triple check that youve packed everything and are really excited. But you dont get that with this job, initially you do but it wears off. Too much travel. How else can you explain feeling ho-hum about being in Paris?

Then it was a case of looking again at what i wanted and seeing clearly that i wanted to be home but not a 9-5 job indoors cuz i think thats just as bad but a job that would allow me to travel and work, or even work in a different country every year or so moving to another country. Maybe freelance webdesign or teaching english in Japan - ive always been facinated by that country, ever since i was in year 3 and out teacher told us about it - as a possibility. But they are currently far fetched ideas and bordering on the castle in the sky fantasy so till i could make it feasabile i knew one thing and that was family, i had to be where my family was and it didnt matter what i did as long as they were there with me.

Sheesh i think i really am homesick. I love the travel but it can really play tricks on you. LOL!


No comments:

Post a Comment